Punting can be fun, but don't end up Falling Underwater..

I heard the ex-snooker player and suicide-survivor Willie Thorne on Hawksbee & Jacob's talkSPORT show earlier today:

http://www.talksport.co.uk/radio/hawksbee-and-jacobs/blog/2011-09-20/willie-thorne-snooker-county-cricket-and-being-bald-21

He's just written a book about his life, which is littered with references to his battle with depression.  This will surprise many members of the public who, like myself, thought Thorne was a happy-go-lucky sort of chap with an excellently sculpted moustache and a wife who is clearly a couple of metaphorical boxing divisions above him. 

Entitled "Taking a Punt on my Life", and I'm paraphrasing / guessing here as I have not read it, his autobiography recollects a career in snooker that provided Big Willie's only viable option for making much-needed money to pay back an ever-increasing number of loan sharks to whom debts spiralled out of control.  These lenders, Willie stressed, were not the nicest of people.



http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2037899/Willie-Thorne-Snooker-star-discusses-sucide-attempt-new-autobiography.html?ito=feeds-newsxml

Now, this blog is primarily about gambling, trading, playing the markets... call it what you will.  Until the day that I lay every horse in a race or offer odds on every conceivable event, I am a first and foremost, a backer.  They say you never find a poor bookie, so I would love to be able to use the Betfair interface to play the role of the bookie at all times and thus fall into that utopian category.. but I prefer to punt. 

I like the thrill of it rather than the business of it.  Don't get me wrong, there are times when I will trade and masquerade as the bookmaker. Take last week, for example: having backed Roger Federer to beat Nole Djokovic in the US Open semi-final, I layed off the Swiss when he had his two match points and fell to 1.06 on the exchange. Having been in an almost identical position the year before, I had declined that option...and lost £425.  I went to bed that night feeling ill.  This year I had learnt my lesson, and walked away from the match virtually unscathed.  But I still lost £300 laying 0-0 in the QPR v Newcastle game (how that ended goalless I do not know) and my UK Betfair P&L for the past 11 days may disturb those of a nervous disposition:

Boxing: -£34.50 | Cricket: £103.76 | Horse Racing: £13.62 | Soccer: -£159.80 | Tennis: -£372.66 | Total P&L:  -£449.58

Listening to Willie on the wireless earlier made me think how lucky I am to live in the age where blogging means I can be open and honest to my readers, even if the numbers of my online readership does fail to outnumber the total amount of goals scored by Leyton Orient so far this season.

He said that he bottled up his problems with gambling, lied to his family and friends, and woke up in the middle of the night, his mind reeling with stress and depression trying to deal with it all.  I wake up in the middle of the night and all I want to do is post on Twitter about my thoughts surrounding the overnight developments in some far-away golf or snooker tournament, or check the Met office's forecast for the next day's weather overhead at the home of cricket.

We live in an age where every advertisement break brings you face-to-face with Ray Winstone telling you to "Bet in Play..NAAAAW", Will Hills bombarding you with old-skool hip-hop beats, and Paddy Power promotions using hot girls with a hint of irony to appeal to the cheeky chancers amongst us.  There is temptation all around.  But there are also myriad sites and organisations that can help those feeling their heinous habit of parting with their cash to bolster their beliefs is running away from them.  There is more opportunity than ever to get your thoughts out in the open.  Willie has done his bit to help, and although he had a reputation for choking at the baize (which he says is mainly due to the fact that he was under more pressure to make money from snooker than most), my admiration for him has certainly been enhanced by hearing him air his opinions out loud, in the open and with a frankness that many punters, gamblers or traders could benefit from facing up to.

Don't Gamble with Friendly Chinese Girls

Did you know that in China, you can't use Twitter, you can't update your status on Facebook, and you can't legally gamble? Despite the fact that I have spent many an hour at a London Blackjack table next to many tea-drinking, coughing and spluttering Chinamen and women, in their own domestic superpower, it is forbidden.


I therefore felt like a sophisticated hacker when, upon reaching my Shanghai hotel last Sunday, I punched my password into the excellent iBetMate App (@betwaregames) and was presented with the familiar screen allowing me access to many money-making market opportunities, and the dubious pleasure of consulting my P&L.


It read thus:

Horse Racing: £10.15 | Tennis: £32.24  Total P&L:  £42.39


My £25 e/w on the talented Chubby Chandler / Lee Westwood-owned Hoof It had covered my stake, returning a measly profit of a tenner for his third-place finish, Murray had done it the hard way, coming back from a couple of sets down against Robin Haase and proving my lay of the Dutchman at 1.5 correct.  The ODI cricket, in which I was exposed to the tune of about £60, was called off and so all bets were void.

I headed out onto the streets of Shangers, taking in the sights on the Bund, dodging bicycles and spitting women who inhabit the lanes off the beaten track, and finally ate some chicken feet: skin, bones and cartilage spiced with a tangy chili glaze. Yum.  Then I met two chicks who took me to a "Tea Tasting Ceremony" in some little establishment, where I paid about £35 for 90 minutes tea-tasting, investing £100 in some of the leaves, before learning later that this classic scam had done me up like a kipper! Was I really that lacking in street-wise nous?  I thought I was enjoying a traditional experience, practised by the easterners since the days of the Ming Dynasty.  Turns out, they had made this Ming a mong :(

http://www.tripadvisor.in/ShowTopic-g294211-i642-k1172540-Tea_Ceremony_Scam_in_Shanghai_BEWARE-China.html

Beware the cute little tea experts!

The remainder of my trip was successful. Despite being able to gamble, I just couldn't really keep abreast of things out there, so I left it all alone.  I landed home on Friday morning, caught up on some admin and managed to make up for a week off from Betfair with a torrid day's trading:

Cricket: -£105.90 | Tennis: -£39.50  Total P&L:  -£145.40

And that's just the UK wallet!  Having backed England vs India at the Oval, I became convinced that the visitors would triumph, with newly drafted all-rounder Jadeja looking impressive. Over on Ashe, I was let down by Roddick's failure to keep up with Nadal's power, who blasted into the final four 3-0 (the set bet scoreline I had laid!) to join the other top seeded racquet wielders. 

Down under, having transferred a £100 war-chest into Betfair's Australian wallet (which also allows you to punt on events occurring in NZ and Tasmania.. looking forward to the National Tasmanian Devil Derby later this year), I promptly lost small stakes on New Zealand to win their opener against Tonga by +70.5 pts on the handicap and Dan Carter to score more than 17.5 individual points - I had £50 on that at 1-2 and was cursing the gorgeous egg-chasing record-breaker as he missed a couple of easy kicks and finished short of my required mark.

My long-term bets for the tournament are £7 on Ireland to win outright at 54-1 with a view to laying off later, and England to win the whole thing: £30 at 18.5.

I'm going to sign off and make a nice English Breakfast cup of Twinings tea, add a drop of milk, and drink it (without slurping or sucking it down like the Shanghai locals) whilst watching England take on the Argies.. no idea what to bet on so will consider the RP's advice of England to win by >11.5pts.


I'm also going to have Wilkinson to score more than 13.5pts, backing at 1.75 with £40.

Xie Xie!!